My boys...

Life is just trucking along..Tucker love is now 7
months old and has this amazing personality. He
went to the Dr today for his shots and she said
he's doing great and he looks good (duh) He
always does such an amazing job after his shots
..He's a tough little guy.

Hubs had surgery today. He is home and resting
and doing just fine.

I am exhausted..Haha getting up at 530, taking
hubs to the hospital, coming back home to take
out the pups, going to Tuckers Dr, then back to
the hospital to pick up hubs.. and when I got
home it was only noon and I thought to myself
when is bed time..Good times!

Super tierd but I would do anything for my boys!

I <3 my little family!

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's day to all! I am so happy to be a
mommy to my love bug. I can't imagine my life with
out him. I woke up to a sweet card from hubby. He
made me lunch and washed my car for me. So sweet.

This day is great but it makes me think about my birth
mom for some odd reason. I wonder if she is celebrating
it with her kids if there is even a thought of me
some where in her head...I don't know. I think I'm
thinking about her 1. Because my older sister is
adopted and she knows her mom and her half brother sent
her photos of her mom recently and 2. because when I'm
alone I tend to think to much and 3. because my
birthday is this month and that is the day she said
hello and goodbye to me. Hmmm?!?

This makes me love my mommy (Linda) and appreciate her
year after year for all that she has done for me and
raising me to be the woman I am today. I love you mommy!
I will be home soon!

Oh life

You know when your younger you just live life
like nothing is wrong..But as you get older
your realize life is a work in progress. Things
come your way and you have to deal with them
the best way you know how..Life tests you through
out your years and you have to be strong to get
through it because if your weak you will be
overwhelmed and your life will be consumed with
negativity. Just remember to stay strong and
surround yourself with amazing, strong, supportive
people.

Volleyball is going great except for the caddy
girls with negative attitudes.. We are all
grown women who are just trying to play, no
need to talk about other teams negatively
especially in front of my husband..Silly girls....
My Liberty league team is 2-0. My Camp Pendleton
team has their first tournament on April 29.
Can't wait to play with the ladies! Busy busy
weekend.. Tonight souplantation and a movie with
the ladies, tomorrow Cierra's bridal shower,
and Sunday grocery shop and volleyball. Next
week a fun play date and then camping with the
family. I haven't been camping in forever. I'm
not much of a camper so good thing they are
bringing a trailer for some of us to stay in. Haha.

Going on in life..

My friend Tiffany seems to be dealing well with
what has happened to her.. They have decided to
take Claire back home to Washington to give her
a burial with her family. I am so happy they were
able to do that because that's the one thing she
really wanted. When I went over to drop off food
for them I stayed at her apartment for a little
bit and she was nice enough to show me the pictures
they took of Claire. She was so tiny and it was
hard for me not to tear up but I knew I had to stay
strong for her. I saw her again yesterday and both
her and the hubby seemed to be doing good. Her
family will be in my thoughts for a while.

I must say I have an amazing husband. He has been
so supportive of me playing volleyball. He goes
to all my practices (which are 2 hours long) and
hangs out with the little bubs. The other day I
told him he didn't have to go but he said he likes
to sit and observe what we are doing. I like it
because afterwards I ask him how I did and he's
honest which I like because I feel like it helps
me. So as of now I practice volleyball on
Wednesday's and Sundays and now I play on a team
on Thursdays. It's awesome. I love being on the
court. It's the perfect amount of me time that
I need. Thanks babea for being there and being
willing to take time out of your day. Love you goober.

My heart weeps...

On Thursday night I received a call from my friend
Tiffany, who was 23 weeks pregnant, telling me that
she was bleeding and asking me what she should do..
I gave her the number to the Naval hospital emergency
room and told her to call to let them know she was
on her way and told her to go asap. I told her to
call if she needed anything.
So the night goes by and nothing..I wake up the
next day (April 1st) check my phone and I have
a missed call from her. I immediately call back
and he husband answers and my first words are,
"is she ok?" he positively says yes she's great
and hands the phone to her. She tells me that she
is 3 cm dilated and is having contractions off and
on and that the sack of water is pretty much exposed.
The doctors put her on bed rest and told her
basically not to move at all. I told her just
to rest and call for anything.
April 2nd I woke up to my phone vibrating, It was
Tiffany's Doula and my friend Amanda, calling to
let me know she had gone into labor and the baby
had passed. Instantly I burst into tears and just
couldn't believe what I just heard. After calls
to my other friends and my sister I laid in bed
and just held Tucker and cried.
The doctor's sent Tiffany home later that day and
when she got home she posted this on Facebook,
"Just so everyone knows, Claire Eliza was born at
12:52 am April 2 and died peacefully eight minutes
later at exactly 1am. she was 1lb 0oz and 12 inches
long. I went into preterm labor Thursday night and
they believe I had an infection within the amniotic
sac which caused the early birth. Mark and I are
doing well. We have great family and friends who have
been offering lots of support and prayers."

After talking to her Doula, Amanda, I found out
that the Naval hospital did a great job and had
a keep sake box for Tiffany to take with her. In
it they put Claire's footprints, little pink
booties, and the blanket she was wrapped in.
They took pictures of Tiffany, Mark, and Claire
together before and after she had passed. Amanda
told me the Doctor that delivered her had a hard
time after and had to excuse himself but came
back to give in condolences to the family.

My girlfriends and I have pulled together in our
friends time of need and we are all making them
dinners and goodies and are going over to clean
and do what other things they need done. At a time
like this they don't need to worry about the little
things.

Tiffany and Mark are so strong in their faith and
hopefully that will help them though this process,
but it makes me think, If this happened to me,
I'm not strong in my faith so how could I possibly
do what they are doing. How could I possibly get
through it? How can a person go through this? Why
did this have to happen to them? There are so many
people out there who don't want children but have
them and then this happens to them.They are such
an amazing couple. So many questions but I can't seem to find an answer to.

I just hope I can be here for her and know what to
say. Please keep them in your thoughts.

Bored

I haven't played Volleyball in forever and I miss
it so..We didn't have practice Sunday so now I have
to wait until tomorrow.. Can't wait..Thus far all
we are doing is practicing.. Our official first
tournament is April 29th. I really hope she puts
me at outside position but where ever she puts me I
will be more than happy to play. I am just happy to be
a part of a team and feel productive.

Hubs didn't shoot this weekend. It looks like it won't
be a while til he shoots. They will have practice but
no competitions for a couple of months which means he
might travel in the summer!

I'm starting to get cabin fever bad and I think it
might get worse. Hubs and I are thinking about
selling the truck and downsizing to one car just
because it would save us a ton of money..Gas alone
for that truck is 50 dollars every time he fills
up. If we do get rid of the truck we are thinking
about getting a little car just to get to and from
work for Wade. I know I just sit at home and my car
just sits in the car port but I like having it just
in case. I don't know..Decisions, decisions.

Lately my little family has been doing portion
control with our food. I must say it is extremely
hard but well worth it. I can tell a difference
in my mood and my body. I hope I can keep it up
because for the first time in a while I feel
confident in my self since having my love. Don't
get me wrong when we do go out to eat (which is
rare now a days) I will have a soda but I still
portion what I eat. I'm oh so proud of us. I am
watching my portions super close this week because
this weekend hubs and I are going on our first
date without the baby so I would love to splurge
just a little bit. :) Thanks to my amazing family
who offered to watch him so we could spend some
time together. It's going to be so weird not having
Tucker with us. Now the key to our date is not to
talk about the baby and concentrate on us. Can't
wait but I will miss my little bubs!

Wooo Whoooo

Volleyball Sunday went great..I only played at 60% because
I didnt want to reinjure my knee and be out for another 2
weeks. I played and it felt great. I have volleyball
tonight and I hope I can play at 100%. We might be playing
Saturday against some youngens but it will be great practice.
Our official first tournement with grown up (lol) is
on April 29th! So excited. Love my team!

Wade is doing great. He has physical theropy twice a
week and is doing excellent. We are both starting to
walk and excercise regularly just to stay in shape
because pretty soon Tucker will be moving like crazy
and we need to keep up.

Wade has decided to rejoin the shooting team. They
invited him to shoot this weekend so hopefully we
can work out our conflicting schedules with volleyball
and shooting. He loves it and I want him to get back
in to it but he know I love volleyball and want to
continue playing..Luckily we have great friends and
awesome family who I am sure would love to watch my
little bubs!

Life is good!